The Pound a Week Rise

"And it's down you go, Jack."

So I was planning to go job hunting today, and the sky just cleared, so I'm going to go soon. Right now, I'm cleaning and doing laundry (and I cook too, ladies. Hard to believe, isn't it?).

Lately I've been noticing that I'm vulnerable to depression. This surprises me, because I'm not usually the type that fights with those sorts of things. I think it is because I'm normally too busy advancing to look around.

Now I'm starting to look around and realize how messed up things have been for me for the last 12 months or so.

How do you say your sorry to yourself? For that matter, how do you accept your own apology?

I very nearly became an icarus, burned out on wings of ambition and intellect, destroyed by my own plans and desires.

But it is just as dangerous to fall too low as it is to fly too high, and I have no interest in running myself into the ground.

So what now? What next?

I look out a window beaded with raindrops and think of all the moments that could have slipped me by. Did I seize the day, or did I simply follow my instincts one step too far?

"Love is a ghost train, rumbling through the darkness.
Hold on to me, Darlin', I've got nowhere else to go."
- Counting Crows

Tuesday, August 10, 2004


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